shoot me.
Tonight we talked for like, five seconds, most of which was about her and i wondered why i was stuck here feeling the way i do, when there are people like that waiting for me somewhere.
I dont belong anywhere, really. like Cat from Breakfast at Tiffany's.
I have no name.
I belong to no one.
no one belongs to me.

they talk about love on sesame street and charlie brown now.
they ask me every day what's wrong with me
why am i not in love
why dont i want love?
why am i depressed?
why am i unhappy?
why am i here
why am i me?

and every day i tell them
I dont know.
i dont know.
i dont know.

and they go about their buisness
they hug their signifigant others
they play house and use me as the baby-doll.

my life is fucked up.
it all seems to happen to Sierra
to Rainee.
to me.
but that dosent make it any good.

my desire to do the things i used to love has dwindled and slowed to a stop.
i would rather curl up into a ball and sleep
or sink under the water of my bath tub and never come up for air.
I dont want to be here anymore.

i dont want to be here at all.

at all.